Adventurous Life

Today my friend and cat of 19 years was put to sleep. She had been ill for a long time and it was amazing that she lived this long, but she quit eating this past week, lost a lot of strength, and was listless. My dad made the decision to put her down and I agreed. She was so important to me; it won't be the same when I go home. I think I am actually taking her death harder than when my grandma passed away 3 months ago. Lady Grey's death was more sudden while I had around 2 months to prepare myself for Grandma's death from cancer. I spent those 2 months grieving and the result was that when Grandma finally did die I seemed to be released from the grief. With Lady Grey every time I left to come back home I always wondered if this would be the last time I would ever see her; I always thought I had more time with my Grandma. Regardless, I miss them both. Aren't our reactions to death funny? We know that it happens to everyone, but yet we are still surprised for the most par...

What happened to the simpler times? The times in my life when I remember being happy? Last year I remember being happy. Sure it was tough adjusting to school, making new friends, and allowing God to work in my life, but I was happy and joyful. Then the summer came and I was isolated from my Christian communities. My friends from school didn't want to make the drive to see me and I didn't want to spend my summer driving to see them so that was one part of my life cut off. Aspects of my Sunday school at church changed and it was more like a high school clique of which I was not cool enough to be a part. I stopped going to that. There wasn't anyone I could takt to or hang out with at work or at home so it was...just...me. I reverted back to my old ways of independence and self-reliance. After all, if there is no one around you for support the only person you have is yourself. I could have been disciplined and stayed connected to God but I let my shame push a big wedge between ...

Why me, Father God? Why did you choose me? Out of all of the people in this world, why did you choose me? Knowing that I would fail again and again, knowing that I cannot be completely obedient--why did you choose me? I hate to disappoint you. Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy upon me. And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness."~ 2 Corinthians 12:9

One of the awesome opportunities about being at seminary is all the really cool stuff I get to read. One of the downsides to being at seminary is the amount of cool stuff I have to read. As a result I have decided to list the books that have encouraged or challenged me, really made me think, or have influenced my Chrisitan paradigm in any way. If you happen to read anything on this list please let me know and we can dialogue about any said reading. I will update this post on occasion so remember to check it. Oprah ain't got nothing on this! * Communication Theory for Christian Witness by Charles Kraft * Mission in the Old Testament: Israel as a Light to the Nations by Walter C. Kaiser * From Jerusalem to Irian Jaya by Ruth Tucker * From the Ground Up by J.Scott Horrell

I wrote the following in a letter to a friend, liked what I wrote, and decided to post it. Is it that I am truly that arrogant or is it that I like to give out tidbits of food for thought? Talk amongst yourselves. There's your topic. "So what has God been showing me in the Word? It's been really cool actually. I used to think that if after I had read my Bible during my quiet times and nothing amazing or spectacular jumped out at me then I had either done something wrong in my approach, had a wrong attitude, didn't read enough, etc. I now see it [the Bible] as the most important story ever. Just as a story has impact points or spectacular instances, so does the Bible, but the most important thing is to persevere to the end of the story and to tkae God's story as a whole. Now this is where the analogy ends because unlike a story the Word is living and active, able to penetrate your very being. It is able to transform. I have been approaching the Bible wrong; I have b...

For one of my classes, I had to write a paraphrase of Acts 3:1-10. I presented my work in class and received some good feedback so I thought I would post it. I wish you could have seen and heard some of my other classmates' work: a rap song, comic strip, pirate poem, an allegory, painting, paper sculpture, and many, many others. Anyway, here is my project. A DAY DIFFERENT THAN ALL THE OTHERS When I woke up that morning I didn’t know it was going to be the day that changed my life forever. It didn’t feel any different. Nothing spectacular happened that morning. I woke up at the same time to the same sights and sounds. Same bed clothes on my body, same mat I slept on, same morning breath, and….the same lameness still affecting my legs. I have been lame since birth. My parents took me to different doctors to see if I could be made better, but there was nothing any of them could do. Eventually my parents gave up trying and gave up hope. It was a hard decision for them to make. See in m...

Preface For one of my classes, I am to answer a reflective question each week. So, if the topics seem odd it is because they are not orignal but merely me fulfilling an assignment like the good student I am. (Those who know me will pick up on the dry humor in the latter part of the last sentence.) I find that the questions are helpful and give me a good reason to post something. The Post In the past week I have been reading from Matthew, Psalms, Romans, and Numbers. The Book of Numbers has actually taken on new significance and interest for me as I have observed the role and importance of the nations in the book. I now read with a highlighter in hand so as to mark whenever the nations or peoples are mentioned. Lately, my prayer life has been suffering because I have not been trusting, and even resisting, that God would answer my prayers. Who am I that He should think of me, to do for me? As I write this, I hear a voice in my head that says, “It is not for your service that I answer you...

Why do I refuse God? I have a relationship with Him in the sense that I try to take from Him. I do not give to Him and neither do i let Him give to me. I have been pretty regular about spending time in the Word, which is good for me. I have not been regular of late. My prayer life is almost nonexistent because i am afraid of what He has to say. I know God loves me and has my best at heart. Why do i refuse Him? Why am i afraid of intimacy with my God and Savior? To be honest, it's because i have been burned so many, many times in the past. I don't want to be hurt anymore. I distance myself as a protective measure but i end up hurting myself more because i deny myself the intimacy with God i desire and need. I want to be wholly God's but i know that i am a liar with good intentions when i sing those words. I have a hard time trusting. I do not like myself this point in my pilgrimage. I wnat to be more than what i am, but i am not obedient enough to get there. I abuse grace. I...

Tonight while at work I was struck by a source power, often unknown, and its ill effects upon my life. The source of power is the power of self and in essence the power of the sinful nature. I have been really sick the past two days (strep throat), and just today I have received my vitality and strength back. I wasn't really looking forward to going to work because I didn't want to lose this strength, get sick even more, and not be able to go to class tomorrow, but at least I didn't have to close. Not long after being at work the manager, who knew about my illness, came and asked if I could close stating that no one else wanted/should to do it. I was honest and said I didn't want to but would if there was absolutely no one else who could do it. She left without saying anything, and the other manager eventually came and told me that someone else would close instead. It was during the time in between the managers' communications that I struggled with the situation. My...

Welcome to my new blog site. I do not promise to be current, but i do promise to be honest. Have a blessed day!